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[As with most Conversation and Cuisine Reaction Sheets, this sheet is distributed to all present at the beginning of the discussion and they are urged to read through it and react to the scenarios and statements. Then we compare notes. In this sheet, the pairs (from side to side) are arranged to demonstrate similarities and differences, along with contradictions in the thinking of the guests. As always, we stress that we are only sharing opinions.]
"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Jesus--"Matthew 7:1-2
"Since everything is but an apparition, perfect in being what it is, having
nothing to do with good or bad, acceptance or rejection, one may well burst
out in laughter." Long Chen Pa, Tibetan meditation master
| 1 Your white workmate is helping an African American workmate to unravel a problem in her computer database. You overhear the white in his frustration call the African American , a dumb N____. She looks up with hurt on her face. You give the white worker a dressing down for insensitivity and hurting other's feelings. | OK Bad |
2 Your other friend at work announces that she is getting divorced. She has fallen in love with another man, and though she has two children, she has told her husband she cannot continue to live a lie. Her husband and children are crushed, but she feels she must be true to herself. You let her know you disapprove of her selfishness, lack of loyalty and willingness to hurt other's feelings. | OK Bad |
| 3 Your ten-year-old son is working on his math. You form a judgment and then point out that he has the answer wrong on a multiplication problem and tell him to do the problem over. | OK Bad |
4 A fifteen-year-old daughter announces to her mom that she has now rejected Mom's religion, Judaism, and joined her boyfriend in embracing Islam. Mom refuses to allow her to go to mosque, and demands that she continue to attend temple. | OK Bad |
| 5 Your friend compliments your dress, but you can tell she was really being ironic. She always thinks her things are more stylish than yours. You decide you are definitely not going to invite her to your Christmas party. | OK Bad |
6 As you come over a hill, you catch your golf partner and employee cheating by tossing his ball out from behind a tree. You ask how he did on his shot, and he pretends the ball landed where it is now. You begin to question the promotion you were going to give him. | OK Bad |
| 7 You visit an African tribe during their female circumcision ritual and behold a teenage girl receiving a clitorectomy. When you complain to your tour guide, he points out your Eurocentric values are interfering with your objectivity. | OK Bad |
8 You visit a Santari ritual where they sacrifice a chicken and sprinkle the blood on their heads. In your heart you are repelled, and you think it's disgusting. | OK Bad |
| 9 You know your brother smokes marijuana and you decide to reprove him for continuing to do something that is illegal and dangerous to his career as a municipal judge. | OK Bad |
10 Your brother is an alcoholic who went through recovery several years ago after nearly losing his family. Now he is drinking again, so you decide to confront him and demand he return to his recovery group. | OK Bad |
| 11 Your feminist friend believes that all the masculine references to God in the Bible are the result of the fact that the Bible is written by men. You rebuke her for passing such a negative judgment on your religion. | OK Bad |
12 Your friend believes Elvis Presley is in the Federal witness protection program. You think he's stupid. | OK Bad |
| 13 Your wife has breast cancer which could possibly be treated, but she believes her shaman has healed her and will no longer deal with doctors, which would be lack of faith. You reject her beliefs and insist she go back to the doctor. | OK Bad |
14 The guy next door belongs to a group of fundamentalists who exclude gays from their group. One day, you let him know you think his group is narrow and offensive. | OK Bad |
| 15 You are the type who thinks we need longer sentences for felons, but your liberal friend thinks you are being harsh and judgmental. | Yes No |
16 You attend a Conversation and Cuisine event and pass judgment in your heart on several imaginary scenarios. | OK Bad |
Read the Judging Invitation Blurb
